


I Was Lost Without You

by ThisOneCannotThinkOfAUsername



Category: Mass Effect - All Media Types, Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Cross-Species Intercourse, F/M, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, My First Fanfic, My First Work in This Fandom, Omega-4 Relay, Pre-Suicide Mission, blowing off steam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-11
Updated: 2020-07-11
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:55:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25206577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThisOneCannotThinkOfAUsername/pseuds/ThisOneCannotThinkOfAUsername
Summary: I felt we were robbed of the Shakarian romance scene when they are approaching the Omega-4 relay, so this was my experiment of how the rest of the day/evening/whatever-time-it-is turned out between them. A lot of feelings and blowing off steam is involved. Oh and a lot of firsts.
Relationships: Female Shepard & Garrus Vakarian, Female Shepard/Garrus Vakarian, Shakarian
Comments: 4
Kudos: 54





	I Was Lost Without You

Shepard finally mustered the strength to turn off the shower tap. She couldn't stop thinking about her crewmates and what they may find beyond the Omega-4 relay (if they even WOULD make it through), but the warm water soaking through her hair and running down her body had helped soothe her thoughts at least a little bit. It had been her go-to trick to calm nerves prior to big battles before, but...this one was different. She had lost her whole crew that she had come to depend on ( _well, except her trusty helmsman thank God_ ) and nobody had ever made it through the relay and back and lived to tell the tale. There was just so much at stake and so many unknowns. She'd dealt with both many times, but, not both at this scale, at the same time.

She grabbed her towel and dried her hair, and turned to the mirror. _No_ , she thought, staring determinedly back at her bright green eyes, _that's not true. We made it through Ilos and the Battle of the Citadel_. Her hands gripped the sink as she thought back to what felt like yesterday. _But...I had more help back then. Now it really does feel like a solo mission. Everyone is counting on me alone_. Her hands gripped the sink tighter as she looked from freckle to freckle. _Which is why you gotta pull yourself together... You got this. You've been through hell before. And this time, you've got an even bigger team to get through this with... They are counting on me to see us through._

Shepard turned to her slick black dress, the only casualwear she had on the Normandy. _Especially Garrus. He's been there with me since the beginning_. She dried her body, put on the dress and heels, and walked out of the bathroom. Fluffing up her still wet hair, she thought of how happy she had felt when she had seen him take off his helmet on Omega, and felt that same excited rush flow through her stomach - which only tripled as she turned and suddenly saw the exact same turian standing near the entrance of her cabin. He was holding a bottle and was dressed in – wow, dressed in turian casualwear. Now that's the first time she'd ever seen him out of his armor...

"Hey...I brought wine. Best I could afford on a vigilante's salary!" He chuckled nervously. Shepard couldn't help but smile. She crossed her arms and watched while Garrus pranced excitedly to the controls on the wall opposite the aquarium to turn on...Flux music. _Oh damn Garrus, you beautifully awkward turian._ He turned around to look at her, spreading his arms wide as if to invite her over for a dance, but Shepard shook her head at him in disbelief, still smirking. So he coolly walked over to the aquarium, watching her, and turned to face her. Shepard slowly made her way toward him.

Garrus eyed her from her dripping hair to her lean, naked legs. He had never seen so much of her body revealed before. He felt his nerves coming back to him, and quickly pushed on to say, "If you were a turian, I'd be complimenting your waist or your fringe, so..." He looked down quickly, steeling himself, and back up again. "Your, um... hair...looks good, and your waist is... _very_ supportive!"

Shepard shuddered internally as she heard his voice drop into his beautiful subvocals as he emphasized the "very", while at the same time giggling internally at his cute attempt to turn a turian flirt into a human thing. She started smiling while he suddenly turned anxious, worried he'd said something COMPLETELY inappropriate. He quickly stammered on, "Hopefully that's not offensive in human culture...craaap, I knew I should've watched the vids. Throw me a line he –“

"Wooah, consider me seduced, smooth talker," Shepard intervened. "Now shut up and stop worrying." She suddenly felt more confident and protective, seeing him all nervous. She didn't want him to feel like he had to go all the way to impress her. She walked over to turn off the music and back again, so they could talk more calmly and without interruption.

"I – I just, uh –“ Garrus sputtered, watching her and then looking down. "I've seen so many things go wrong, Shepard. My work at C-Sec, what happened with Sidonis." Shepard felt her feelings take a stronghold of her again, watching this man she admired and appreciated so much become overridden with guilt and regret. "I want something to go right. Just once...just –“

Shepard moved forward and raised her left hand to gently touch the right side of his face, right where the rocket had hit him the day she had found him again. _The day she had saved me from my fate_ , Garrus thought to himself, as he froze, feeling the slow stroke of her hand down his scarred, bandaged face. He stared at her, shocked at the sudden gesture, and felt a rush (probably matching that of Shepard's) run through his chest and stomach. He felt all his anxiety dissipate with that stroke and be replaced with a much, much warmer feeling.

Shepard lowered her hand and stared back at his bright blue eyes, watching him. They eyed each other for a while, both experiencing a rush of warm feelings coursing through. Then Garrus slowly leaned his head forward, and Shepard instinctively did the same, to meet him in what she had learned to be the turian equivalent of a kiss. Their foreheads touched for a while, keeping each other's gazes held while they savored this intimate moment.

Garrus looked down and slowly raised his free hand to stroke Shepard's left arm while she continued to watch him. This was all very new to them both, but at the same time, they didn't feel uncomfortable at all. They knew each other probably better than anyone else knew either of them. They had been through hell together, Garrus always watching her six. No, uncomfortable no, but nervous maybe yes.

Shepard reached her right hand up this time, put it on his left shoulder, and stepped forward to close the remaining gap between them. Slowly, she looked up at him, and pressed her mouth against his mouth, soft fleshy lips on hard rough plates. She closed her eyes and kept her lips pressed there for a few seconds. Garrus closed his eyes in response too. _This was new_ , he thought, _I haven't felt what a human kiss feels like before, but this is...pretty nice actually. Spirits, she's so soft._

Shepard leaned her head back and looked up at him again. "You're so tall, even when I'm with my heels!" She sniggered.

Garrus chuckled back. "Does that make it hard to kiss me?" He asked.

"Only a little… I've dated tall guys before, but it didn't stop me," she answered. "Are you considered average for your species?"

Garrus chuckled again ( _Oh God, I love it when he does that_ ). "Ahh...pretty much. But...I can make this easier for you?" He looked behind him. "We could take it to the couch, or bed?"

Shepard smiled back. "You read my mind."

Garrus moved his right hand down her arm to enclose it around her left hand. _Oh, how nice her hands feel. I could get used to this..._ He led her down the bedroom steps and they sat down at the edge of the bed. Shepard let out a little "oh! Let me just get the wine glasses," got up again, and quickly went to the table to retrieve the glasses. She turned around, smiled, and sat back down to the right of him. Garrus easily pulled off the cork and poured the wine. She gave him his glass, they looked at each other, said a little "cheers", and took a sip. _Not too bad I'd say_ , Shepard thought, _he has good taste..._

They both looked again at each other's eyes, green on blue, holding the gaze for a bit.

"You know –“

"Y-you look –“

They both started, and chuckled. _Oh this was going to be a funny experience either way._

"You go first," Garrus said.

"Alright then...Officer," she added, retrieving another small chuckle from him. She shivered again. "You know...when I first saw you on Omega, when you took off your helmet, I didn't think I..." She hesitated. She didn't want to divulge too much too fast. She could ruin it all like that. After all, how could she know he really DID feel the same way about her? And actually, what DID she feel about him exactly anyway? Not even she knew. This was just supposed to be a one-off little thing, to savor before they went off on the (potential) suicide mission. She took another sip.

"...yees?" He asked in his deep voice, bringing her back to the present. He was still looking intently at her.

"It was so good to see you, Garrus. I didn't know if I'd ever get to see any of my old crew again, having been practically dead for 2 years and everyone having moved on and all. It was very...strange to be awake again and be in the hands of a completely new crew, new ship." She looked away, while Garrus' brow plates contorted into concern. "But when I saw your face and heard...your voice...I didn't believe it at first. What were the odds that it would be you I'd be picking up from Omega on my first recruiting mission...? But then again, I should've suspected something, when I heard that the so-called _Archangel_ was trying to create order in a cruel, unjust society." She looked back up at him, a wry smile on her face.

He raised his brow plates and took a big sip. "Well indeed, who could it be. And you bet I felt as shocked as you when I saw your N7 through my scope. I almost pulled the trigger by accident upon seeing it. ALMOST, I said," he emphasized, for Shepard gasped. "I have more self-control than that, you should know."

"That you do, my friend. That you do. Like waiting for the end to get into bed with the commander, Mr. Vakarian," she teased. "'Savoring the last shot before popping the heat sink', you say? Well why don't you show me what your savoring looks like."

Garrus was taken aback by the sudden directness, but he regained his composure quickly – he was used to her quick wit. He took a huge gulp this time and set the empty glass on the table. "Oh, you ready to test out my reach, are you? Well, that I can do for you, my friend, that I can do," he said, as he waited for Shepard to drink the last drops of her glass, reached for it, and placed it on the table next to his. Then he leaned in, wrapped his long deft arms around her, and pressed his mouth against hers.

They opened their mouths at the same time. Shepard slowly pushed her tongue into Garrus' mouth, and he responded by twirling his tongue around hers. _Wow, what a tongue. It's...so long!_ She thought. Then he pushed their tongues back into her mouth, continuing their dance. The flavor was...really something to savor, actually. Shepard could taste the tart wine mixed with some...slightly metallic nuances. _I wonder what I taste like to him_ , she thought.

Garrus brushed his hands up and down her back while Shepard held on to his carapace, and then he slowly pushed his right hand into her red hair. He stroked his fingers through it, and she let out a soft moan into his mouth. _Oh what a lovely sound_ , he thought. _And, this human kissing thing really is...quite nice. And Spirits, what lovely, sweet-smelling hair to run your talons through._

Shepard felt a tingle run down her neck as he stroked his fingers through her hair. She reacted automatically with her tongue becoming a little more eager. She loved the feeling of fingers running along her scalp, and his neatly groomed talons really did the job extra well. "That feels so good," she mumbled into his mouth. He chuckled, and slowly, gently, moved her down onto the bed, not breaking contact throughout. Their breathing intensified slightly, as their tongues picked up the pace, and Garrus continued running his hands through her hair. Shepard reached her hands up and behind his fringe, and slowly traced her fingers along his neck. Garrus groaned into her mouth, subvocals reverberating into her and down her spine. She shuddered.

Garrus broke off. "Everything okay? Is this...okay?" He asked, panting slightly. Shepard felt another rush inside her from his caring concern. She pecked him.

"Yes. More than okay. Thank you for asking," she smiled up at him. He smiled back, and leaned in again to kiss her. But she opened her mouth to try to speak. He backed off. "I love it when you do that – that thing with your voice," she confessed.

Garrus looked at her curiously. "Oh really, does _this_ ," and he lowered his voice again and turned his subvocals up, "turn you on?"

Shepard shivered again. Garrus laughed. "I see... That gives me something to work with."

Shepard responded by grabbing his neck again and stroking with her nimble fingers along the softer parts under his fringe.

"Oh Shepard, that feels..."

"Yeah, like how it feels for me when you do that thing with your voice, I bet," she grinned, her voice now sounding really raspy, surprising herself how turned on she sounded. He grinned back, his mandibles flaring.

He looked down, all serious now, at her clothes. He contemplated the smooth leather-like material of her dress. Then he looked back up at her, and, with his right hand still stuck in her hair and arm supporting himself on the mattress, he ran his left hand down from her hair, along her neck, over the curve of her shoulder, and back down her arm, slightly touching the bulge that is her breast with his thumb. All the while switching between watching the progress of his hand and observing her reactions. She looked up at his eyes and drew a breath in and sighed as he brushed past her breast. _I remember reading about that sensitive area_ , he thought. He continued down and traced his fingers along the right side of her body, following her beautiful curves becoming her hips. _Oh Spirits, what a beautiful shape._

Shepard felt the tingling running through her again, with Garrus seeming to find sensitive spot upon sensitive spot on his journey down. He finally reached her thigh, upon which he carefully grabbed her right leg and pushed it up slowly from the knee. Her dress rode up.

"Wow, you really do have flexibility, Shepard," he said. She chuckled and sighed.

"I am loving this curiosity. Please keep exploring my body. I am enjoying this," she laughed softly, stretching her arms and placing them above her head. He smiled back, placing her leg back down and leaning in again to give her another kiss. Then he moved over to the left again and, carefully, gently, nibbled a small area of her neck. She let out a soft gasp.

"Everything ok?" He quickly asked again, scared he had gone too far.

"Yes! Just, wow. That – that feels..."

He smiled. "A turian way of...teasing, of courtship. We have...slightly thicker skin than you do, so I just wanted to – I just want to make sure you're okay."

She smiled and again said, "I'm more than okay. I'm with you. I trust you, Garrus Vakarian." _I trust you with my life, I've done that countless times_ , she thought.

At this he became so overwhelmed with – was it love? – for this woman and felt his animal instincts take over. He growled and kissed her, moved down to her neck again, licking the side of it, nipping the skin again, careful not to bite too hard, licking the place he bit her... She let out another gasp, a moan, and, he could visibly hear her panting now as well. The feeling of his sharp teeth against her neck felt like his talons scraping against her scalp but only 10 times more acute.

He sat up and crawled down to take off each of her heels and reached to place them on the floor. He turned back around and saw Shepard had sat up and started unzipping her dress from the back, but he quickly moved to her to take over. He grabbed her hands, placing a peck on each of them, and then drew the zipper down with his left hand, while supporting her back with his right. The soft leather material fell apart, the shoulder straps sagging down her shoulders now. He pulled them down her arms and…that revealed her black lacy bra covering her breasts. He admired the intricate design on each cup, first with his eyes and then with his six fingers, upon which Shepard breathed another sigh and closed her eyes. He looked up at her, pleased at the response he got, and then back down again at the laces.

“May I take this off?” He asked her. She opened her eyes and nodded.

“Maybe I can help you with that. Bras are difficult to take off, even for human males,” she chuckled, and reached behind her to unclip her bra. She slid the straps off each of her arms, and threw it aside on the floor, while Garrus watched and looked down at what he now saw before him for the first time in the flesh.

“Is that how you treat such beautiful clothing, Shepard?” He asked, still staring at the two mounds before him. “I love the intricate designs on that thing, and… Spirits,” he exclaimed. “I saw diagrams of this, but I – I still didn’t really know what to expect. I – these breast things, are they – I,” he stammered.

“Hey, it’s okay, Garrus. You may touch them. Here –,” she grabbed his left hand and pressed it against her right breast, and he tensed up a bit. “I know, probably a bit too soft for your liking, you’re not used to something like this, but they –“

“No, I – I do like them, Shepard,” he said and looked up at her. “It’s amazing how soft you are, and this, I just didn’t know what to expect, how it would feel.” He smiled. “I wanted to say earlier how beautiful you looked. This is the first time I’ve seen so…much of you. We just see you in your armor or uniform.”

“Well exactly, that’s what I thought when I first saw you striding into the room,” she laughed. “You NEVER take off your armor, I was worried you just didn’t own any other clothes. Anyway…do you need a pointer? I can show you what I like so you can learn for yourself. Or, actually, since we’re on the topic…why don’t we move on to your outfit. I haven’t seen a real turian in the flesh either,” she grinned.

He smiled back and started unbuttoning his tunic. Shepard watched as more and more of his greyish-brownish skin revealed itself underneath. Within 5 seconds, Garrus had his shirt removed and Shepard helped him slide it off his arms. They eyed each other’s naked upper halves for a few moments, before Garrus put his arm behind her and gently laid her down again onto the pillows and mattress. He went on to run his tongue down along both sides of her neck, circling especially at the places he had nipped her, bringing another few sighs and pants out of her. Feeling her hot breath against his skin, Garrus started feeling his plates shifting down there…

Hearts beating fast now, they both ran their hands urgently around each other’s shoulders and arms, and Garrus moved further down again. He looked at the two mounds on her chest, and proceeded to squeeze the right one with his left hand, keeping himself supported with his other arm. Shepard let out a gasp and closed her eyes as she felt his hand push onto her nipple when he squeezed. Garrus looked up at her face, and then went on to try a little further, taking the nipple between two of his fingers, and rolled it gently between them, just like he had read in one of Mordin’s pamphlets.

“Oh God, Garrus…ohhh,” Shepard moaned. She grabbed his face and pulled him towards her lips, so that she could kiss him again in appreciation.

Garrus went back down and turned to the left breast, twisting it slightly, bringing another moan out of her. _Oh, her sounds are just as exquisite as the feel of her. Spirits, I want to make her feel good. I want to make this night count._ He then decided to try another thing. Leaning his face over her breast, he gently nipped her left nipple with his front teeth, and upon that, she literally cried out.

“Ooooh, oh my God, Garrus. Uh-huh…” She felt her eyes water a bit at the sensation, a mix between a slightly piercing pain and electric exhilaration. “Keep going, please, keep going…”

Encouraged by her words and sounds, Garrus moved to the right nipple and did the same, careful nipping. But scared he would go too far, he sat up, straddled her, and let his hands take over again, at both nipples. Shepard started writhing underneath him, eyes still shut. She cried out more and more, Garrus feeling the heat build up inside of him as he watched and listened to her. Steadily, he went on, kneading the tiny protruding things, as well as the general mounds. Then he leaned down again to plant another kiss on her lips, and moved his head down to the side and nipped her on the neck again. Upon that, she screamed. _Yes_ , he thought, _please, you can do it, Shepard._

“GARRUS! I’m going to – I – I’m going to…c – c – ccuuum…!”

“It’s okay, do it. You can do it, Shepard,” he encouraged her. “ _Please, cum for me_ ,” he growled into her ear, turning up his subvocals again.

Shepard obeyed right away, letting out a loud “AH” and shuddering along her whole body. It was a quick one, the pleasure riding through her in rapid waves. He sat up, continuing to knead, watching her with hot desire as she rode them out.

She felt slightly giddy when she finished and caught her breath. She opened her eyes and looked up at him, her mouth in an open smile. And, grabbing his carapace, she pulled at him to bring him down next to her and scooted over to lie close to him. Lying sideways and facing each other, they smiled, both still panting.

“That was the first time I have ever climaxed from someone playing with my breasts. Well done, Garrus Vakarian. I think the biting and subvocals helped,” she grinned.

He felt deep pride at those words. He, a turian vigilante, had managed to make Commander Shepard, the most badass human, cum in a new way. “I’m glad to hear it, Commander.” He swallowed and continued, “In fact, you sounded so lovely yourself, I’m finding it hard to stay tucked away inside these damned pants…”

Shepard stared at him, and burst out laughing. “Oh my gosh, how can I have been so selfish. Here, we’d better quickly move on to the next phase then…!” she said, as she sat up.

“It’s okay, Commander, I have gained a great command over my vices under your command,” he interjected, rising up to meet her. Then he smiled and said, “But it wouldn’t hurt, no…”

She laughed at this, and they both proceeded to unzip the remaining parts of their clothes. Shepard helped Garrus slide down his pants, while Garrus helped Shepard slide up her dress over her head. Garrus removed the rest of his pants and threw it over to the chair, where he had thrown his tunic earlier, and, Shepard, watching his strong body contort as he did so, did the same right after with her dress. The only thing left now was her underwear, as Garrus wasn’t wearing any ( _I guess turians don’t need underwear?_ she thought), and she leaned back against the cushioned bedframe and lifted herself to let him slide them down her legs. Garrus watched her arms as she did so, admiring the bulges of her muscles appearing in her upper arms as she lifted her body weight. He threw the underwear towards the pile of clothes, not looking back, because he was so enamored by her whole body now. Her whole soft, lean, pale body. Shepard watched him take her in with his eyes, and looked down to do the same with his whole body. He looked so alien and so strange, so many hard angles and tough skin, but, yet he also looked so –

“Beautiful,” she heard him say, and she looked up again at his eyes. “You are so beautiful, Shepard.”

She felt another warm shudder of feelings rush through her insides, and she leaned in to kiss him. “You too, Garrus. Now I know what you look like.” She looked down at the protuberance poking out between his legs. _Wow, so his tongue isn’t the only big thing here. I guess turians are generally almost a size bigger everywhere…_

Seeing where her gaze was, he said, “Usually it’s covered, hiding behind my groin plates, and it takes quite a bit of coaxing to get it out. But, I don’t know, it didn’t need that much today. Maybe, there’s something about you, Shepard…”

She moved towards him, with the intention of straddling her legs around him, but Garrus was quicker and pushed her back, with more force this time, onto the pillows. Her breasts jiggled upon impact, and he groaned with pleasure at the sight, his cock responding in much a similar way. His animal instincts taking over again, he leaned down and proceeded to stretch out his tongue and traced it down the middle of her body, between her breasts (“oh!”), down her stomach (“oh-oh!”), and then, he paused and looked up, seeing her head lifted to watch his progress. She felt her skin cool where he had been, and watched with anticipation at what he was about to do.

He looked down again, at the folds between her legs, darker red hair forming a triangle and covering most of the area. Then, he dived in. He stretched his tongue out, and gently traced it below the tuft of hair, making a circle on the two big folds between her legs. Shepard moaned and widened her legs, to give him further access. _Wow is she wet. I read about this as well, and it’s so true. And what amazing flavors she brings out._ He savored the slightly sweet, slightly salty juices she produced, and continued to twirl his tongue around on the inside of her soft, slick, swelled up folds, extracting exquisite sounds from her above as she started to writhe again. He saw her finger come down and point at a little knob just above where his tongue was, and she pressed against it. _Oh, that must be the…clitoris_ , he thought. He looked up, saw her eyes half-open and her breathing quickening, and looked down again at her finger, understanding what she meant. He moved his tongue up to gently touch the knob.

Shepard felt another electric pulse shoot through her, and it was all she could do not to buck her hips up and hit poor Garrus’ face. She continued to squirm as he circled her clit with his very skillful tongue, and she grabbed the sheets firmly with her hands to try to stabilize herself, her strong hands bunching up the soft sheets around her. She let out a series of moans, and continued panting loudly, feeling the pressure build up inside her again, this time more intense than last time. This was the best, surest way of getting her off, and he sure as hell was good at it, even if he’d never played with a human body before. She tried to delay her climax as much as possible, trying to savor the moment.

“Oh Garrus, Garrus…oooh, it’s so nice. It feels so good… I can’t, I – ahhh. Please, don’t stop,” she begged.

He obediently continued twirling her clit with his tongue, and proceeded to grab her calves to steady her. She appreciated this, as the buildup was getting unbearably strong. He had her juices all over his mouth plates now too, from his tongue acrobatics and with the amount of liquid she was producing. Her smell was so overwhelmingly strong, he liked it, and he couldn’t get enough of it, of her. He loved the mix of her softness, her wetness, her writhing… She suddenly seized up again.

“U-hUUUUUH! Ooooooh…Gar-ruuuus!” She exclaimed. She kept on crying out his name this time, shortening it with every breath until he could only hear the g between her heavy panting, and then all he heard were her ultrashort gasps for air. Ohhh he couldn’t take it much longer, he had to go inside her soon.

He moved away to let her hips move freely and moved up to lean his face in towards hers, keeping one finger playing down on her clit. He watched her ride this second one out with her eyes closed again, tears running down her face. He wouldn’t be able to describe the overwhelming feelings he had for her now even if he tried.

Slowly she steadied, her breathing easing up. She opened her eyes and saw his beautiful, piercingly blue eyes staring down at her. She couldn’t describe her feelings either even if she tried. This man, this turian she had picked up some years ago on the Citadel, he had always been there for her since he boarded her ship. And he sure as hell wasn’t letting her down now. She leaned up to kiss him, tasting her own juices, thanking Mordin silently for having provided antihistamines for both of them earlier. He eagerly returned the kiss, now feeling more turned on than ever. He felt so damn hot for her right now.

“Shepard, I…I need…I need to, to feel you –“, he uttered, in almost a whimper. She stroked his mandible, looked at both of his eyes, and nodded.

“It’s okay, Garrus, you can bring it inside now. I want you inside me too, I need to feel you there,” she breathed.

Grateful, he moved down again and used one hand to slowly place his quivering length at her entrance, the other moving her folds apart. He looked up again at her with a questioning look, and she nodded with a slight smile, encouraging him.

He gently inserted himself into her, knowing full well he had to be careful, what with their slight differences. But it went much better than he expected. She was so ready for him… She gasped while he groaned upon entering, which drew another shudder out of her. _Oh Spirits._ He slowly pushed his hips onto her to ease himself in, watching her facial expressions as he did so, until she finally covered all of him. He waited for her to adjust, her super soft, wet, warm insides shaping themselves around him.

“Uuuuuh, oh Garrus, you’re – you really have reach, my dear.”

He noticed the change in her designation with fondness. “And you really have flexibility, my dear.”

He leaned back down towards her face as she chuckled, placing his arms at the sides of her head, and he kissed her with such tenderness that she had never felt before, running his hands through her hair again as he did so. Then he slowly jerked his hips up and down, kissing her, stroking her hair, breath quickening again. His body was another source of heat upon her already sweaty body. A silly thought made its way into Shepard’s head as she kissed him back. _I will need to do laundry when we get back from the Collector base_ , she thought, not having the energy to care about how silly or illogical her thought maybe was right now. The languid bucking of his hips was all that mattered now, the feeling of him moving in and out, and the way his tongue danced around her tongue again, and the way his six fingers scraped against her scalp. She returned his movements with her own hips, slowly pressing her hips up, down, up, down, demanding more and more of his movements as he slowly picked up the pace. She, he, started panting again into the others’ mouth, and they had to break off the kiss as they both started breathing as if they were running into cover in the heat of a battle, preparing to shoot down more Collectors.

She found his eyes again, and he kept her gaze the whole time, quickening his movements, and he added a forceful end to his entries, receiving an “oh” and her eyes closing every time he did so. But she always opened them again to find his gaze, to look into her lover’s eyes, whom she had never looked at before in the same way.

 _Oh Spirits_ , he thought again, as he felt himself sinking into her grape-green eyes, swimming in them. _I don’t know if I’ve ever felt this way before about anyone_. He now had to hold on tightly to the mattress to steady himself as he continued pushing into her, but he was afraid he’d collapse onto her before they finished. He pushed his arms up to sit up in a kneeling position, with only his hands, knees and feet on the mattress, and he lifted her legs up onto his shoulders. She apparently liked this angle, because he saw her swing her hands down to the mattress and grip the sheets again, and he could feel her tightening slightly inside. _Oh, I can’t hold this much longer, and I don’t think she can either…_

Her breasts were really moving up and down now, and he tried to grab one of them with one of his hands to feel them, and then moved back again to steady himself. He looked into her eyes, seeing her watch him, and swore he didn’t want to take his eyes off her ever again… Her “ohs” kept on growing louder and faster as he quickened the pace, to the most desperate pace he thought he could do. He felt his need for release coming on strong now…

“She-She-Shepard… A-a-are you cumming? I ca-can f-feel myself c-cumming soon, a-aahh…” His subvocals reverberated deeply inside him, spreading down into their connection and up through her body. At this, she, too, found her need uncontrollable, and cried out to him. Her face contorted as she tried to keep eye contact.

“Garrus, I – I am also – OH.MY.GOOOOOOD!” she exclaimed, and at this she fully tightened against him. He closed his eyes and felt himself burst open, spilling everything inside of her while his hips bucked even more violently against her than he ever thought possible. She jerked her hips up against him, matching his moves, crying out in a long, loud “OH-OH-OOOOOOOH” while he groaned just as loudly, his subvocals carrying them through, as their feelings overloaded…

Shepard’s hips stopped moving first, and Garrus’s gave a few last pushes against hers, with Shepard’s folds fluttering frantically around his cock. Panting profusely, Garrus lowered himself down one last time to her face, giving her a quick peck on the mouth, and carefully turned them sideways to lay down facing each other, still conjoined. He relished in the feeling of her flutters around him down there, while he watched her open and close her eyes up here as she rode out her third climax. Absolutely spent, they were, both of them. But in oh so good a way.

Finally, Shepard relaxed. She opened her eyes again, sighed, and smiled the biggest, warmest smile he had ever seen, and he returned it. She stroked his left mandible and raised her right leg up to hook it on his left leg’s spur.

“Mmm…I really liked that tie-breaker,” she breathed.

Garrus let out a tired laugh. “Me too, Shepard, me too.”

“You really popped the heat sink this time.”

Garrus laughed again.

They wrapped their arms around each other and held each other close. Shepard nestled her head neatly into his cowl, and Garrus placed his chin on top of her head, breathing in her scents again. Both of their skins were still hot from the “sparring” activity. They closed their eyes and stayed like this for another 5 minutes, savoring the moment, feeling their energy slowly returning.

Shepard opened her eyes and raised her head up to touch his forehead and pressed into it. He opened his eyes too. “Shepard…” he breathed, feeling electricity pulse through him again as he found her eyes.

“Yes, Garrus?” She breathed softly back.

“Shepard, I…I want to thank you. Well, first for taking me on board the SR1 way back, then finding me again to take me on board the SR2, and…now again for giving me the most perfect memory to treasure while we throw ourselves again into hell for the good of the galaxy. You’ve always been saving me from my fate... Shepard, I – I was lost without you.”

Shepard felt the tingling going through her body all over again, music sounding in her ears.

“I don’t know if, how things are going to turn out. I just hope we’ll make it, I mean, under your leadership we can’t fail, we have the greatest chances ever. I just, I…I don’t want to have to lose you again, Shepard…” he finished in pain.

“Garrus, look at me,” she said, because he had closed his eyes as he had said those last words. “Look at me. We ARE gonna make it. We’re a team, Garrus. I am sure as hell gonna give it my best shot to get us all through this and out of there. And you can bet that, what we had just now, it’s given me something more to live for. It’s gonna help carry me forward in the most difficult times. Now that I’ve gotten to spend some real quality time with you, and see more of what you’re really about… I, I want to thank you as well, Garrus. I, I don’t know about you, but…” She hesitated again. No, she didn’t want to ruin this perfect moment between them by saying something stupid, like…

“Commander, ETA in 30 minutes,” Joker announced over the PA.

“Okay, thanks Joker,” Shepard answered quickly, slightly irritated, looking up, then back down at Garrus. “Garrus, I –“

He interrupted, feeling the nerves coming back to him. “Shepard, it – it actually hit me _really_ hard when we lost you. I mean, you were my Commander, you brought me out to do something that really mattered, you made me feel like I could finally do something right for once, make the galaxy a slightly less screwed up place than it is. And the way you dealt with everything with such class, such skill… I gained so much respect for you, admired you so much… But then we lost you with the Collector attack, and I… I felt so lost, Shepard...”

Shepard felt tears coming on. She hadn’t expected all this to come out of the turian vigilante.

“I only really realized then how much, how much I needed you, but it was too late. I found my way to Omega, built up a new life, formed my new family…but that was taken away from me as well, and…but then you show up again in my life out of nowhere and I couldn’t believe my luck.” He looked determinedly at her eyes. “Shepard, I just wanted to let you know that you mean the world to me.”

“Oh Garrus...” She was crying now. “Garrus, I…you took the words out of my mouth. I was just about to say the same thing, but I was too scared to, but, I… You mean the world to me too, Garrus,” she sighed.

They leaned in to kiss again, wet and passionate, feeling the future pressing in on them. Until Shepard felt a twinge of anxiety about the time. They broke off and Shepard looked over at the table clock. 20 minutes until ETA.

“We’d better wash ourselves off quickly and get ready,” Shepard said. “You are permitted to join me in the shower,” she smiled.

She led him to the bathroom and turned on the shower tap again. She walked under the stream and grabbed his hand to pull him under too. They wrapped around each other, not letting go as the hot water trickled down, slowly stroking their hands down each other’s bodies in silence.

“Commander, ETA in 10 minutes, you might want to come down,” Joker’s voice came over the PA again.

“We’d better go,” she said. She turned off the tap, grabbed a fresh towel from the cabinet and gave it to Garrus, while she grabbed hers from the bar.

They rushed back to the bedroom, Garrus putting on his casualwear so he could walk in them to his cot and put on his actual underarmor and armor, and Shepard putting on her underarmor from her wardrobe. She walked him to the door, and they held each other’s hands for a few seconds.

“No matter what happens, Garrus, know that I will always be looking out for you.”

“And you will always have me watching your six, Shepard.”

She watched him call the lift, waved, and then went back to put on her armor, before going down to meet Joker at the helm to oversee their entry into the Omega-4 relay.

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my first ever fanfic, ever (and on top of that, smut fanfic!). I discovered the Mass Effect trilogy only a few years ago, and have since played through it thrice. What lay behind my obsession the most was, of course, the Shakarian romance... And, to my delight, I found out I was definitely not alone on that one!!! Their romance inspired me to write a fanfic for the first time.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it, and please don't be too hard on the newbie! :)


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